Courage Empowers Our Kindness Journey
Courage takes you out of your comfort zone
and into your power center.
Dr. Debra Reble
Many people think that kindness is a wishy washy way of living. Quite the contrary, kindness is a powerful force for good in the world, and it becomes an even greater force when empowered by courage.
The word “courage” comes from the French word “oeur”, which means “heart.” By taking a step with courage, we connect with our power center and discover a strength within that we did not know we had.
Sometimes courage is required in order to just keep going during challenging times, not giving in to despair or the feeling that there is no good way out of this situation.
Often, kindness will help us to make that shift. Being kind does not mean standing down or not engaging on an important issue. It simply guides us to show up peacefully and to state our position in a way that does not demonize other people who hold a different point of view.
When we make a commitment to live with kindness, we open the door to opportunities that will invite us to expand our kindness practice. Eventually, we will encounter difficult situations that require us to step out of our comfort zone.
When we are reluctant to take that step, it’s time for self-reflection.
The courage to look at myself
The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions.
~ Alfred Adler
A staring point may be to ask, “From whom am I withholding kindness?” This will help me to look at the judgments I have about others and to consider how I can see them through a kinder lens.
Do I judge others based on appearance, behavior, ethnicity, religion, political party? Do those things determine my behavior toward them? If so, I am giving away the power to be in charge of my own behavior.
When I chose to live with kindness, I was choosing who I wanted to be in the world. I was choosing to see the humanity in others, to remember our kinship. From that perspective, I am able to drop my judgments and to respond to others with the assumption that they are doing the best they know how to do in this moment.
Then I am ready to take the next step.
The courage to step out of my comfort zone
Sometimes bravery is simply choosing to take the next step
without fully knowing the path.
Glennon Doyle
Most of us have kindness habits – certain circumstances in which we find it easy to be kind. When people see us coming, they smile, because they remember us, and we are comfortable being with them.
Sometimes, we are given the opportunity to be kind in situations that ask more of us. It might be as easy as a pleasant greeting, acknowledging someone we might have passed by previously. A brief conversation might follow, and that connection could uplift both of us.
The Bystander Effect
At other times, we may witness someone in need of help, but that requires more of us than just a smile and a few pleasant words. Perhaps others see it also, but they choose to ignore it, not wanting to become involved.
When a situation calls for action, but no one else is helping, it is easier to be influenced by the group thinking. Something inside of us knows that our response could make a difference, but we are reluctant to help. We can tell ourselves, “It is none of my business” or “Someone else could help, why should it be me?”
This is called “the bystander effect.” It is an opportunity for us to take the lead and to be an example. When one person has the courage to respond with kindness, others will usually step up to help as well.
Once we have stepped out of our comfort zone a time or two, it becomes easier the next time we are given the opportunity. Our choice becomes more clear if we ask, “What would I want someone else to do if that were me or someone that I love needing help?”
A kind intervention can bring a positive outcome to a difficult situation. It uplifts us, the person we help, and anyone who witnesses our act of kindness. When people have witnessed someone else’s kindness, they are more likely to intervene the next time they are called upon to help another person. There can be a ripple effect from one act of courage.
The courage to take a stand on an issue I care about:
I raise up my voice–not so I can shout out,
but so that those without a voice can be heard...
Malala Yousafzai
It takes courage to take a stand for what we see as right in the face of what we see as wrong. When we speak up in a family discussion with a point of view that is in opposition to the views of others, we risk being rejected.
When we speak out in public against a current injustice, we risk even more. Taking a stand often requires courage, especially if your message is speaking out against commonly accepted practices or what other people believe.
Sometimes taking a stand requires activism. In our culture today, we often think of activism as cultural and political protest, but it is much more. It can take the form of determined advocacy at various levels of government. It can be expressed through written or video messages to inform the public of an important issue. In some cases, it can be a dramatic single act to bring attention to a current or impending tragedy.
Behind every action of advocacy is a cause that people feel passionately about because it affects their lives or the lives of people they care about. It is an act of love.
Now, whenever I see or read about demonstrations for or against something, I ask myself, “Who or what do they love? What quality of life do they want more of or what are they fighting against that prevents them from having a missing quality in their lives – or in someone else’s life?”
Advocacy means speaking out, but it can also mean joining an organization that is working to find solutions and to improve an issue that I care about. That might mean showing up to help with my hands and feet, ready to do the required work.
At any level, taking a stand requires courage, and in stepping up to the challenge, we often find power within that we did not know we had. In the process, we expand our kindness circle and help to create the world we choose to live in.
We wish you courage and joy on your journey.
Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay – Man at Sunrise
We invite you to enjoy our favorite song about courage:
The Impossible Dream
The 9 Cs of kindness are words that describe important aspects of a kindness journey. We invite you to check them out: Choice, Commitment, Connection, Curiosity, Courage, Compassion, Change, Community, Celebration
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We’re grateful that you are on this journey with us.
With love from our hearts to yours,
Pat and Larry
